Tuesday, February 27, 2024
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Rev. John Farmer’s ‘Reflections’ column

by John Howard Farmer

Visit the Irvington Baptist Church website

Lessons I’m Learning

Years ago, I stumbled upon this collection of wisdom, which I am sharing with you.

We cannot make someone love us, all we can do is be someone who can be loved, the rest is up to them.

No matter how much I care, some people just don’t care back; it takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it; it’s not what we have in our lives but whom we have in our life that counts.

We can get by on charm for about 15 minutes, after that we’d better know something.

We shouldn’t compare ourselves to the best others can do; we can do something in an instant that will give us heartache for life.

It’s taking me a long time to become the person I want to be, need to be.

We should always leave loved ones with loving words, it may be the last time we see them. We can keep going long after we can’t.

We are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel; either we control our attitude or it controls us. Heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.

Money is a lousy way of keeping score.

My best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time.

Sometimes the people we expect to kick us when we’re down will be the ones to help us get back up.

Sometimes when I’m angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn’t give me the right to be cruel; true friendship continues to grow even over the longest distance—same goes for true love.

Just because someone doesn’t love us the way we want them to doesn’t mean they don’t love us with all they have.

Maturity has more to do with what types of experiences we’ve had and what we’ve learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays we’ve celebrated.

We should never tell a child that their dreams are unlikely or outlandish; few things are more humiliating and what a tragedy it would be if they believed it.

Our family won’t always be there for us; it may seem funny, but people we aren’t related to can take care of us and love us and teach us to trust people again—families aren’t just biological. All throughout life others are born in our hearts.

No matter how good a friend is, they’re going to hurt us every so often and we must forgive them for that; it isn’t always enough to be forgiven by others, sometimes we have to learn to forgive ourselves. No matter how bad our heart is broken the world doesn’t stop for our grief.

No matter how we try to protect our children, they will eventually get hurt and we will hurt in the process.

Our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.

Just because two people argue, it doesn’t mean they don’t love each other and just because they don’t argue, it doesn’t mean they do. We don’t have to change friends if we understand that friends change.

We shouldn’t be so eager to find out a secret—it could change our life forever.

Two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.

Our life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don’t even know us.

Even when we think we have no more to give, when a friend cries out to us, we will find the strength to help. The people we care about most in life are taken from us too soon.

Credentials on the wall do not make us decent human beings.

It’s hard to determine where to draw the line between being nice and not hurting people’s feelings and standing up for what we believe (adapted).

Pray God to help us to develop in his image!

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