by Ginger Philbrick
Nouns, verbs, adverbs and adjectives when spoken or written singularly convey no harm. But when constructed in sentences uttered in a mean-spirited manner they can literally alter our lives in the most damaging way.
From time to time, readers will ask me how I think it is best to handle hurtful words. I have written many times on how to respond, or not, when affronted by another’s jabs. But I think that equally important to address is the long-lasting effect such verbal assaults have.
There is much prose and poetry written on the subject. The following poem entitled “A Harsh Word,” and whose writer is anonymous, is a favorite of mine:
“One day a harsh word harshly said,
Upon an evil journey sped.
And like a sharp and cruel dart
It pierced a fond and loving heart.
It turned a friend into a foe
And everywhere brought pain and woe.
A kind word followed it one day,
Sped swiftly on its blessed way.
It healed the wound and soothed the pain
And friends of old were friends again.
And yet the harsh word left a trace
The kind word could not quite efface.
And though the heart its love regained,
It left a scar that long remained.
Friends can forgive but not forget
Nor lose that sense of keen regret.
Oh but if we could learn to know
How swift and sure our words can go,
Then we would weigh with utmost care
Each thought before it reached the air.”
Sometimes we need to express our anger, disappointment, distrust and other negative feelings. However, we always have the choice as to how we do that and we can always choose kindness in the doing.
Ginger Philbrick is the owner of Because You Are Polite LLC. You are invited to email your manners questions to her and she will respond as time and space allow. You may contact her at youarepolite1@gmail.com.
