by Ginger Philbrick
What I am about to tell you may come as a very difficult thing to accept. However, I can assure you that I have consulted the foremost authorities on manners in America and feel confident in what I share.
The proper way to enter a row of seats in which people are sitting is with your face toward the front of the room or stage.
I recently overheard a conversation in which a woman said with great conviction that she certainly doesn’t want someone’s posterior to be in her face when they were entering her row. But then that begs the question of whether she would rather the person step on her toes and possibly fall in her lap, not to mention the awkwardness of being face-to-face to strangers as you inch by them.
Well, no matter what you choose to do….and you almost always have choices as to your behavior….please consider the following advice from the long respected Emily Post Institute:
“Entering a row of people is always inconvenient, but you can minimize the hassle. Begin by saying “excuse me” to the person on the aisle and then, down the line, “thank you” to anyone who moves or stands to let you pass. Face the front of the room or the stage. This means showing your back to the people in your row, but should you trip or stumble, it’s easier to regain your balance (and maintain your dignity) by falling forward against a seat rather than into someone’s lap. Proceed as quickly as you can—a sort of sideways semi-shuffle enables you to move along without stepping on feet.”
Those who are already seated and are trying to make themselves as protected as possible from the “passer” can often make the process more pleasant by moving their feet to the side, in the direction that “passer” is going. And even better, if possible, by standing up.
Of course, if you reserve those middle-of–the-row seats and get to the theater early, your body parts will be protected and, should you have to get up during the performance, you can serve as a model of row exiting etiquette.
Ginger Philbrick is the owner of Because You Are Polite LLC. You are invited to email your manners questions to her and she will respond as time and space allow. You may contact her at youarepolite1@gmail.com.
